20 months

January 27, 2012

January is always a blah month for me! Sometimes it feels like a big let down after the holidays and hustle and bustle of fall.

Most of January I spend waiting for it to get warm outside, dreaming of a swim or a trip to the beach. As I was thinking of last summer and what fun we are going to have this year now that the babies are mobile I took a second and I looked at my kids today- really looked at the mish mash of my family- these kids are my people, made partly by me, partly by Justin and partly by all the others before us with their own contribution to the mish mash. These kids are each so just themselves it never ceases to amaze me the way each of them uniquely embraces life & situations they are confronted with.

The past two weeks everyone- including me has been sick with some nasty cold virus that won’t let up! It is always frustrating for me to watch my kids be sick and forced to be down and out. I think they get that from me- I hate having to lay around, needing unnatural amounts of sleep and stillness, unable to complete simple tasks like laundry (ok who am I kidding, its hard to get done on a good dayJ). The poor kids are still feeling crummy- and despite the mommy efforts and comforts they still are coughing and are extra tired/cranky. I have pretty much spent the last two weeks at home struggling with their sickness & mine. Forget all the other nonessential stuff like cleaning, and actually for reals this time neglecting the insurmountable task of laundry.

Then it hit me. My kids are really easy to enjoy if none of the other “life” stuff were there “demanding” to be done. If I didn’t have to struggle at the grocery store with three kids- holding one and sitting one in the single seat cart, if I felt like I had a grip on my brood in public, or at home. Really my job is to keep them safe, healthy and clean right? What if all those things alone are struggles- and overwhelming? Maybe I am still a rookie Mom, that I haven’t figured out how to balance working full time, three kids and all of that life demands. The most frustrating part about all the "life demands" requires that I have to stop myself and remember to enjoy my people- to laugh at their quirks. To hold them when I’m trying to do the dishes, to play superhero squad even though I have no idea what that means? A little more improvisation I suppose...

I have to learn to embrace the household stuff with reckless abandon, wish I could learn how? I think someone forgot to tell me that these struggles are part of being a Mom. That most people can also get caught up in the everyday things, or become frustrated at the offspring when in reality they are actually behaving developmentally appropriate. Bummer. I want to say that sometimes I wish it were easier for me to relish in my children and their awesomeness. That everything else was just not that important, because it’s definitely NOT more important. I just get easily caught up in the “other stuff”. This week a small part of me was screaming inside that Laura doesn’t want to work anymore. A bigger than I want to admit part of me wants to stay at home (gulp) and struggle with teaching my children. A small part of me doesn’t mind not getting dressed everyday and staying in jammies (I am particularly horrible at getting dressed when I stay at home) But I cannot indulge that small part at least not for another year until Justin has made it all the way through. A big part of me loves being a Mom and a small part of me doesn’t like being overwhelmed. I wish all the parts of me could just get a kick out of my kids at least 90% of the time.

We still made it in one piece to 20 months, seems like such a short time for two little people to accomplish so much!

Heidi has turned into quite the talker. A little less screaming since she can ask for what she wants! She talks all the time, asking for snacks, twinkle winkie star, skinkmarink, complete with hand motions (Skinamirink song), a popscicizie (popsicle), milk, water, juice. Diet coke is still a daily request though rarely indulged. She says yeah, all done, brother, garwet, cartee, cheese, more. She loves to pick out people in pictures and read stories. Right now she loves this Doc Hudson board book that she asks to have read to her at least ten times a day. If I cant read it to her she opens its and makes up her own words and the says “all done, mommy ree” She loves to play outside and asks several times a day- “ouside”. She still loves to be carted around and loves to mimick whatever I am doing. She loves to tell Garrett to sit down and shake her hand at him. Both the babies love to sing a bathtime song I made up and love to sing songs in general. She is very sensitive little girl and wants an apology whenever she feels slighted, she is very forgiving though and immediately will say “all better”. She is a stubborn little spitfire that loves being around people and loves to laugh. I love her little pigtails she wants to sport & her big smile with her chubby cheeks and how she shows her teeth! I couldn’t have asked for a better little girl to have in our family!

Garrett is such an affectionate little guy! He runs up to us looking as though he is going to tackle you and shouts “HUG” he the grabs on tight around your neck and giggles. He is quite the busy boy. His favorite thing to do is figuring out how everything works. He has to try to take apart everything, push every button, take things out, put them back and try again in a different way. He loves machines- vacuums, dishwashers, phones, computers, plugs, outlets, cameras etc. He loves to help stir with spoons when I’m cooking and loves to taste everything, sweep the floors, wipe up messes, dump things out, put them back. A sneaky little habit he has had lately is throwing things away in the trash can, like his shoes, sisters toys, and brother’s cars. He loves to wrestle, loves to run and be “chased”. He wants to do everything like Carter, play the Wii, crash cars, play with superhero and transformers. Carter is indulgent most of the time. He loves his blanket- what Justin called a blanket was a “baboo” which stuck with our children. He says quite a few words but is more selective about when he talks. He can say all the same words as Heidi but lets her do the talking while he is more the “doer”. He is little Mr. Mischievous and sneaks off quite a bit. He wandered upstairs yesterday and drew with a sharpie and highlighter all over our sheets and blankets. He still loves to brush teeth and wash hands. He loves any type of water. I anticipate and have found him the most difficult child to keep safe!!! He is constantly smiling and laughing, has a terrible temper but is slow to anger! We love this wild little boy with blond curls!