Ahhh…
Justin went back to work Monday. We have barely made it to Wednesday!
How can two newborns and a toddler need 4 grown adults to manage?!?!
We are all exhausted beyond belief!
Justin’s 84 year old grandma has been staying with us- she is on baby rocking & bottle feeding duty.
My mother in law has been here too everyday, staying up until 1 am or later with me to manage feeds, & then getting up at six am so I can sleep for a four hour stretch...
This is pure craziness. I feel like such a zombie.
This is by far the most difficult thing I have ever tried to do. I am so overwhelmed I cannot even figure out the best way to handle this.
Am I supposed to be able to do this by myself?
During the middle of the night when they both cry and I cannot take the time to snuggle each of them, enjoy their noises, look at their tiny hands and feet and do all those things I love about having a newborn…I feel guilty, I feel rotten.
I want to be that picture perfect Mom (that doesn’t exist), never needing any sleep, that cherishes even the most trying moments with a smile and never wants to lose it.
Not the Mom wanting to scream when everything is a diaster, everyone is crying and you want to just cry too. The Mom that thinks for a second that 3 kids is too much...
I feel bad for Carter because I have zero patience for his new found antics at getting any kind of attention he can.
I am exhausted. I am not doing a very good job at this.
I am just trying to survive, knowing that in a few weeks or months it will get better and these endless days and nights will be a distant memory if remembered at all.
Our babies have come so far, done so well given their circumstances surrounding their premature birth...
They are amazing.
Hats off to all mothers out there, most of you have been here even if for a short while
This is not easy but the only battle worth it.
So tomorrow will be a better day.
I will have more patience and be well rested and be able to do it all by myself right?
We can all dream can’t we?
2 comments:
Aw, Laura. Hang in there. I have 2 other friends that just had twins, and they are both saying the same thing. You are not alone. I have those days with one baby! I cannot even imagine 2! You are an amazing mother, and those babies are so lucky to have you. I wish I were there to come rock and feed a baby for you. Just remember these days will pass, and they will be sleeping soon! Good luck!!
Hey Laura,
Just came across your blog. My twins are 9 months old and my toddler is now 4 but when I read this post it brought me right back to the beginning which seems so long ago. Hang in there. Things get so much easier so quickly. Appreciate the times that they don't nap together so that you can give them all that attention that you wish you could give them. Once the babies start responding to Carter, he'll get easier too. Thanks for this blog!
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